During a recent episode of righteously relieving myself in a public restroom, I was lucky enough to overhear two elderly gentlemen exchanging pleasantries while they awaited their turn at the urinal.
Old Man One: "Well, Good afternoon!!"
Old Man Two: "Hi"
Old Man One: "Beautiful weather we're having, isn't it?!"
Old Man Two: "Yep"
Old Man One: "We're BLESSED!!!!!!"
Old Man Two: "Harumph"
(For the record, I am NOT "Old Man Two")
This sort of declaration, "We're BLESSED!!!", is not uncommon. In fact, it's so commonplace, that most of us just overlook it in the same way we ignore a "bless you" when someone sneezes. It's cemented in our lexicon like a goddamn malignant tumor.
Take a moment, now and then, to just pause and consider the motive, intent, and structure of these sorts of statements. The utter arrogance it must take to muster up the concept that, in this case, there is a cosmic deity, capable in the estimation of the deluded "believer", of both creating AND destroying entire universes, capable of creating matter from nothingness, who has seen his way clear to granting special favor, for NO apparent reason, in the form of high barometric pressure, to a specific zip code on a map. The declaration that "WE'RE blessed" must include all those who exist under that bubble of high barometric pressure. No cause and effect. This favor of the deity was not "earned" by any accumulation of benevolent deeds. It was just "tossed" out there like a random playing card by the big woowoo in the sky, in the form of a bubble of high pressure. Those who happen to be under that bubble at that time, are "favorites" of the deity, while those who are living with inclement weather, are clearly fucked, in the eyes of this same deity, again, for no reason whatsoever. The arrogance of saying "THE GIANT DEITY IN THE SKY LOVES ME BEST AND HERE'S THE EVIDENCE!!!" takes such an enormous level of delusion, on every level, as well as a sense of narcissism, that it's almost too grandiose to measure.
This sort of "Us vs. Them" mentality rears it's ugly head countless times per day among every single encampment of the cultists. Whether it's a natural disaster that lays waste to some area, wherein some individual or group of individuals survives, they are declared to have been "spared by GOD", for some "mysterious" reason. I have to wonder if a halfway house filled to the brim with the worst sort of paroled sex offenders was struck by a series of F5 tornadoes, and, by the GRACE OF GOD, one or two of them were to survive, seemingly miraculously, if the devout zombie lovers would see their way fit to declare "THEY WERE BLESSED!!!!!". Surely the same "rules" must apply to them as well as you fine "churchgoing" folk. The deity saved them, most certainly. AMEN!!!!
No?
Hmmmm. Funny how that works then.
So maybe, the next time some deluded grocery bagger at your local Publix says to you, as he bags your D size batteries for your double headed dildo, "Have a blessed day", you could respond to him, with "Thanks Skippy! I'm gonna need that blessing while I'm digging up a fresh corpse to fuck in the ass"., and see how quickly he scrambles to retract that "wish" for your "blessing".
And maybe, one day yet, you'll take a moment to reconsider the insipid shit that flows so freely from your pie hole as you declare the magical nature of the lens through which you view this world, and see how purely childish and willfully ignorant your views are. In that process of enlightenment, you might also realize how utterly fucking stupid you sound when you invoke your magical bullshit in your routine daily encounters.
Grow the fuck up, eh?
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